what about what we eat?

I recently watched a video on food in America.  It was terrifying! Patenting genes, genetically modifying food by injecting cells with E. Coli, destroying farmers lives....and no one seems to care!  I want natural food, I want REAL food. I want something that came out of the Earth, something that is the way god made it.  People in America wonder why there is an obesity problem, well its because of our food.  It's not real.  And it doesn't do pretty things to our bodies!  Our food is controlled by big business.  What we need to live is controlled by major corporations!  Why doesn't anyone seem to be upset about this?  We have very little freedom here when it comes to what we eat (isn't America supposed to be all about freedom?); organic food is both expensive and shipped from all over the world, so that isn't very good either.  There are only 4 types of potatoes for us to grow or choose from here in America.   That is silly, that is wrong!  Species are dying, or already extinct, and on top of that, life is being patented!  There is something fundamentally wrong with patenting life; this has opened a whole door that will only cause us problems in the future, I fear.  I don't understand why the American public isn't more upset about this! Of course, people need to be better informed, thats the first step.  I'm sure the majority of people don't know, and therefore can't care.  People need to know!  Something needs to be done!  Children will, already are suffering, because of this!

I'm thinking about doing research and doing my senior thesis project on this whole topic.  So far I've been painting a lot of food.  Food is a beautiful, wonderful part of every humans life, it is a simple pleasure that we have to indulge in, except here in America we don't know what that means.  Its about eating food that is low in calories, low in fat, will keep up moving and is quick....its not real, its not good, and its no wonder the American public has a poor relationship with food.  They don't even know that they do!  

Sorry about this rant, I'm very upset about this whole food situation.   Finding good, simple food in Italy was never a problem.  It's a huge problem for me now.  

Here is a link to the documentary, watch it:

http://www.hulu.com/watch/67878/the-future-of-food

white houses

Its been strange to be home, very strange.  I can look back on the little girl in high school, and I feel for her, I long to talk to her, to tell her it will be alright.  Who I am is so much different, so changed, from that girl.  I feel like, for the first time, I am completely separate from all of my life in high school.  All of the problems, the drama, the pains, it all seems far away; it does not touch me, it calls to me no emotion.  But then again, this isn't really 'home' is it?  It is, because it's the house I grew up, its where my parents live.  But it's not where my life is. It's not where I belong, where I fit.  A girl I knew, a girl I know well, lived here.  It's strange, moving forward.  It's strange, letting go.  

We drive,

past the cool houses

white and beige and stucco-covered

lit up, luminious, hovering above us in the dark

They intimidate and mystify like the stars

(or so their owners hope)

and we nestled into them, long ago

someone we once knew

was nestled into them.

 

The songs we used to listen to in the parking lot

the haze of early morning still on us

These songs-they had meaning, they taught us truths

(or so we thought)

and they fit our lives, our moments

a perfect backdrop to everything.

We listen to these songs now,

singing, screaming along to them

they are so far behind us,

like picture books, photo albums,

we can feel moving, somewhere deep inside.

 

As we run, barefoot

Through  a large

24-hour

city-sized

florescent-lit

store

Through the heavy halls

of memories

of papers, planning and scandal

Through the endless playground

of perfectly placed trees

winding roads

matching mailboxes

white houses

We know we are no longer home.

 

Taking a deep breath

we have sung it all out

All of the things we held so tightly

have flown out the window;

lost to the cool darkness

that wraps herself around us.

And so we propel ourselves forward,

Forgiven.

Triumph!

I heard on the radio yesterday that the reign of the name 'Emily' has ended.  For the past 12 years it has been the most popular baby name for girls, but has recently been replaced by Emma and Isabella.  I feel bad for all the little Emma's and Isabella's of the world, I'm sure that their moms will tell them, "I didn't know anyone with your name when I named you that.."

It got me thinking though.  I had a Grandma Betty and a Grandma named Judy.  Both names seem 'old' to me.  I can't imagine meeting a girl my age named Betty.  That would certainly be cool, but is unlikely.  Of course this is just the way things work, there is a cycle, but it's weird to think that, possibly, by the time I'm in my 80s, the name Emily will seem like an old name.  Names like Edith and Iris were, at one point, fashionable names, but now seem like old-lady names to us youth.  How funny!  Emily will probably be regarded as an old lady name!  This is wonderful.  

So there's a fun little tid bit for you.

 

Take a Deep Breath

Last summer I visited London.  It was my first time out of the United States (I'm not counting the Canadian side of Niagara Falls).  It's funny, before going I wasn't so much excited about going to London.  Of course I knew I would be seeing great art, and of course I was excited about that, but it wasn't London that was the big draw for me, it was the idea of traveling, of being someplace completely new, getting away.  I ended up falling completely in love with London, and now desperately want to go back, because it's London.  

It's strange to think about how much my world has changed in the past year.  I've been to 4 different countries, and experienced things that I can't experience in America.  The world is smaller to me, in the sense that I can see things in other parts of the world.  Of course there is still a vastness to it, but I can visual things now, they are no longer image-less ideas and notions in my mind.  Of course there are places that I haven't been that I cannot fathom, but I can at least fathom perhaps being there someday.  But I have memories of places now, places beyond my home.  

The more that I see, the more that I've experienced, the more widened things in my mind become.  The past year has made me realize how little I actually know, if I even "know" anything at all.  "Everything we think we know is absolutely unknowable (and/or just plain incorrect)."  said Martha Rosler.  How true that is.  When I was in high school I knew so much about life; who I was, what I wanted, what I could/couldn't do, how things worked in the world.  Today, I don't know what I want, or how the world works.  I don't know what I can and cannot do, and I don't know who I am (though I am quite comfortable these days with simply "being").   In some ways its so exciting, so liberating.  In other ways, its terrifying.  As I head into the summer before my senior year of college, and beginning to seriously think about the future, it is overwhelming and scary.  I don't know what I want, and I don't know what's going to happen to me, or what is a good step to make.  But it's also exciting.  I have all of these ideas, dreams and desires.  I want to travel, I want to paint, I want to do yoga, I want to play with little kids...and I have the rest of my life to do all these things.  Sometimes I just have to take a breath and remind myself of that fact.